I can text with my tongue
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
