some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
