Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
