Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
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