You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
