What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
What drink are we having for lunch?
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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