you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Randomize
