fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
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