Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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