NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
