Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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