I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
