There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
Randomize
