I'm so fucking centered right now
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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