I like to think it a success when the cops are called
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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