Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
