What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize
