Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize
