apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
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