somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
