When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Randomize
