My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
