So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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