they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
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