This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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