My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
So vagazzling was a success
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
Randomize
