i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
my being single is dangerous.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
dude. I can hear the air.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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