Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
