THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
