in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
