Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
