why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
