You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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