Christians are straight up FREAKS
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
