I think im going to throw up on grandma
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Randomize
