spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I have so many feelings about this burrito
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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