I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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