She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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