Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
