She's JV to your varsity
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
