He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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