I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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