you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
