Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
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