): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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