I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
