Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
Randomize
