dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
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