I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
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