Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
This is your morning-after text courtesy of your very confused friend!! :) To discuss "what the hell were you trying to tell me last night," press 1. To laugh over your drunken antics, press 2. To pretend like none of it even happened (or to respond with concurrent confusion because you have no idea), press 3.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
